One Heck of a Month! Plus, a yummy sandwich recipe.

It’s been a little while since my last post.  For some reason, I can be super creative when I’m supposed to be listening at church.  Literally dozens of ideas were rattling around in my brain until I told myself to pay attention!!! The last month has been bursting with new experiences; bear with me as I try to narrow my topic down.

Tulum Ruins

My husband and I celebrated our 20^th wedding anniversary early and we went to Cancun, Mexico.  It was the first time I’ve been away from my kids for that long.  Ever! We were gone for 5 days. I didn’t worry since my parents came down and stayed with them, it helped knowing they were in awesome hands. We also had neighbors that pitched in to give my mom a break. Lucas did wind up calling a few nights to prolong bedtime, but for the most part my kids held it together and kept the sibling rivalry to a minimum.

One of my favorite memories of the trip was when my husband turned to me and asked, “You’re a world traveler now; where do you want to go next?”

We packed a lot into our time there.  We swam with dolphins and snorkeled in the ocean. We explored the ruins of Tulum and even jumped off a 14 foot cliff.  The camera malfunctioned and didn’t record my leap, so you’ll have to take my word for it.

I'm at the top of the cliff.

When we got back home we took my oldest son to his week long summer mission trip to Camden, SC, called Salkehatchie (http://www.salkehatchie.org/home/) and it’s sponsored through the United Methodist Church.  This was Will’s fourth year attending and he looks forward to it every year.  Teens from all over the state of South Carolina (And some from Arkansas, North Carolina, and Wisconsin) come together and rehabilitate homes for those in need. The teens, under adult supervision (Will is editing this and can say adult supervision was not the case), hang siding, rip up and then lay new floors, as well as many other home repairs.  It’s a beautiful thing. 

I am so proud of who Will is growing up to be.  I try to leave him out of these posts to respect his privacy , but I want to share the feelings I’ve had lately of watching him grow away from me and into an adult. That’s the whole point of being a parent, isn’t it? Raising them to be productive, kind people? He’s fiercely independent and more than a little stubborn.  He’s shown great choices in the people he chooses to hang out with. It’s just a little sad to think that he won’t always be here cracking jokes with me.  It’s an adjustment to go from being the center of someone’s world to watching from the sidelines. 

Maybe that’s why Mary treasured all the things up in her heart when Jesus was little. (Luke 2:19) She knew He was special and for a little while she was his center. What a responsibility we all have as mothers to train these little people in a way that we don’t diminish the specialness God places in each of them. Holding them close to us, kissing their boo boo’s and at the same time not worrying when your son drives off to run errands in his new (used) SUV.

Mary was there through a lot of Jesus’ ministry. She was there for his first miracle (John 2:1-5).  She was there as he hung from the cross. (John 19:26-27) I look to Mary as a godly example of motherhood. 

How do I love with open hands that encourage my child to become who God knows them to be?  It’s a challenge not to hold them so closely to me that they don’t or can’t leave. My second son told me the other day that he’s going to Afghanistan as a missionary. What do you say to that? No? Don’t go?

Will and Nana.

It’s difficult to think ahead and think of a time when we won’t all be together under the same roof; yet, it’s exciting and rewarding to see Will (and the rest of them) grow into who God knows them to be. But, today is not this day! This day my son is still with me.  Ok, technically, he’s working at Chick-fil-A a lot of the time, but I think you get the picture. 

I know my time with him is limited so I’m a little more willing to cater to him.  I want him to come back home after all. With that in mind, I like to make some dinners he likes.  (I was wondering when I started this blog how I’d get a recipe in here.) One of his favorites is “Roast Beef to the Rescue”. Cute, right? It’s a roast beef sandwich on crusty bread with a spread made of cream cheese and sun dried tomato pesto. It was another recipe I had entered in Paula Deen’s recipe contest with Philadelphia Cream Cheese back in 2010. Here’s the link to the YouTube video and the recipe follows:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dH5hjGiblG4&t=128s

Roast Beef to the Rescue

Ingredients:

6 ciabatta rolls

1 pound shaved roast beef

8oz shredded mozzarella cheese

1 sweet Vidalia onion, sliced thin

1 sweet colored pepper, sliced thin

1 8oz block cream cheese, softened

2 tbsp sundried tomato pesto

 Lettuce leaves/sliced tomato (optional)

1.       Preheat oven to 350

2.       In a small bowl combine the softened cream cheese and sundried tomato pesto

3.       In a small sauce pan, cook the onion and peppers until softened. Add a pinch of salt and pepper

4.       Line a baking sheet with aluminum foil, lay the bottom of the buns and layer with the roast beef, onions and peppers. Top with mozzarella cheese.  On the top bun, slather it generously with the cream cheese spread and sprinkle on some more mozzarella cheese.

5.       Bake the sandwiches for 5-10, until the cheese is melted and gooey.

6.       Top with the lettuce and tomato slices and serve with carrot sticks and maybe a fruit salad.

Enjoy your babies. Learn about what makes them special, teach them about Jesus and love them with open hands.

I’ll leave you with Proverbs 15:20: A wise son brings joy to his mother.

Perfectly Imperfect and Grateful For It

I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s caught up in the whirlwind that is the five weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas.  Coming off of my tumultuous Thanksgiving, I am determined not to let stress get the best of me. 



My Loves.

What stress you ask? The stress of wanting to make the holiday’s perfect.  I know I am not the only person who wants to make things special for my kids, or my husband, or my friends.  We all have the desire to express to those we love how special they are to us.

In honor of Christmas, and the meaning of Christmas to me as a Christian, I am determined to celebrate my imperfect moments as much as the perfect ones.  After all, Jesus being born to a teenager, in a barn is not a story of perfection.  It’s a story of humility, grace and love.   

My sweeties asked to do a gingerbread house.  The past few years, it got put on the back burner since it entails a little work and requires the house to sit on the counter as decoration. I also need to set aside my control tendencies and let them do it "their way". 

Kids do not know the difference between a decoration and food.  Almost as soon as the house was erected, it was picked clean.  It still sits on my counter and they still ask to eat it. 



After.

Before.

My Christmas tree now leans to the right.  When it went up on Thanksgiving evening, it was straight, tall and beautiful.  It’s still beautiful after a sibling wrestling event sent it crashing to the floor.  The fact that it’s loaded with delicate ornaments makes it cumbersome to try and straighten. 

 My red bows are askew and the ribbon is not quite even, but to me it’s still beautiful.  I’m glad no one cut their toes on the broken shards of ornament bulbs.  It turned into a learning experience as Natalie learned to get off someone’s back when they’re done giving piggy back rides and Lucas learned not to fling her off in frustration.  I’m glad the tree was there to break her fall. 

 

Christmas is also a time for Christmas pageants at church.  My kids were in two this year.   The first was put on by our special needs community, Special Friends.  The playwright and lead character is Sydney and she has Down syndrome.  She is amazing, courageous and determined.   I am so proud that my children were all eager to step in and help. 

Natalie and I seated at the table.

While sitting in the green room before the play began, I looked at this room of people that the world would call imperfect and see how beautiful they are.  They all have hopes and dreams.  They have friends and purpose.  They are deeply loved by God. 



 

Lucas as "Grunpy"




 

I’m not sure how those three stories blend together, except that maybe what could have been major stress bombs, (messy kitchens, wrecked trees and an extra Christmas play) turned into beautiful moments of sharing time with each other while celebrating the beauty of imperfection. 

 

(Oh, I did manage to glue poor Lucas's hat to his head and in the process had to cut a little hair to get it off. He probably won't celebrate that.)

 



What happens in team building exercises....and a recipe for Beef Tikka Masala

I was sitting in on a youth group parent meeting this past Sunday and our project was to “build a daughter”.  We were to list what we’d like the young lady to have as personality traits, career choices, skills she’ll need to accomplish things, when and if she should date and get married.  Seems fairly simple, right?  It got a little interesting.   For career choices I had listed “mother, teacher, and whatever she wants to do”.  I was the only woman to list mother as a career.   One other shared later that she was thinking that, but didn’t list it.  Why don’t we think about motherhood as a career?

When I was in kindergarten, we had to write what we wanted to be when we grew up and I said, “a mommy”.  Lots of little girls, I’m sure have all had that expectation.  I also wanted to be a writer.  I am happy to report that I’ve fulfilled my childhood expectations; yet, I am a bit reticence when I tell people I’m a stay at home mom. 


My loves, five years ago.

I once made mention to a friend that I was thinking of going to career day as a “mom”. She quickly asked if I “would take a basket of laundry or maybe demonstrate changing a diaper” to help with my talk.  I since have dropped wanting to talk to elementary kids about motherhood.  Yet, my desire to put in a plug for what I do hasn’t waned. 

Why laundry is impossible.

Sure, it would bring validation to what I do, but I think there’s an art to it that’s being lost.  I’ve enjoyed the verses in Titus chapter 2 that speak about older women teaching younger women to love their husbands and children..and not to be drunk on too much wine.  (A little wine is ok, just not too much. Paul knows, we'll need the wine. I hope you know I'm kidding.)

I’m not saying that women shouldn’t work outside of the home.  I want my Natalie to find out what she wants to do and go after it with her whole heart.  I also want to teach her that having the blessing of a family entails a little effort and sacrifice.  It’s been a sacrifice that has been worth it to me.  I don't second guess for an instant my decision to stay home with William and beginning to babysit versus pursuing a career in medical billing at the age of 24. Our family would’ve had more money, but I would’ve missed those quiet snuggles after naptime and picnics at the park. 

I am forever grateful that I chose a husband who felt that having me home with our child was important to him too.  He has never badgered me to “go back to work”.  He sees my value at home and has always supported me.  It was a sacrifice when he took a second job and went to school full time.  It has been a sacrifice when I’ve been home alone dealing with the fourth temper tantrum in three hours. It's been a sacrifice when we were all crammed into  750sq foot home, but, it’s a beautiful sacrifice and I think if more young adults understood that you can plan for it now by the choices you make in who you’ll marry and how much education you should pursue. It's ok to make motherhood a priority over a huge career. 

Now that my children are getting older and life is less "all hands on deck" I am able to pursue my interests. My interests are different now than when I was 24.   The fact that I put myself on hold for a few years gave me time to mature and really become myself.  I'm certainly not saying that my way is the best way, it's just the way that's been the best for us.

I will say that what makes our success at home possible is our shared relationship with Jesus Christ.  (If you couldn’t figure out I was Christian, now you know.) When Al and I began dating, he was looking for a Christian girl and I hadn’t made dating a Christian guy a priority.  We went into the relationship asking what we’d like in marriage.  He asked if I was planning on breastfeeding when I had kids on our third or fourth date.  My point in that is that we asked all those questions to see if we were on the same page BEFORE we got swept away in romantic feelings. 

Loving Al has been the best choice I have ever made.  He accepted me when I was a hot mess at 21 years old and has given me the grace to allow me to change into who I am today.  Not everyone has the patience, but because Al loves Jesus, he has the patience.

This post was supposed to include a recipe.  This post was also supposed to be light and funny.  

Beef Tikka Masala

I had already typed up my recipe for a dish that needs a name.  One suggestion was Beef Tikka Masala..I’m going with that because Beef and Vegetables in a Tomato Sauce Because it’s too Hot for Beef and Noodles is too long.  

Enjoy the recipe and thank you for listening to me.

Beef Tikka Masala

2.5# cubed beef
¼ cup flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp curry powder
1 tsp fenegreek powder
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp onion powder
1 tsp garlic powder
½ tsp allspice
1 tbsp worstschire sauce

``Mix flour and seasonings in large ziplock bag.  Add beef and shake until all dry ingredients are coating the meat.  Add the worstchire sauce and work into the meat as evenly as possible.  Let set for at least an hour to marinate the meat. 

For the Sauce:
1 tbsp minced garlic

1 tbsp minced ginger

Love how colorful the veggies are.

1 small onion thinly sliced

1 large zucchini cut into large cubes.  Peel if you prefer.

½ c thinly sliced red pepper
1 15.5 0z can garbanzo beans (aka chickpeas)
1 tbsp paprika
1 tsp fenegreek powder
1 tsp black pepper
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp cumin
1 tbsp curry powder
1 small can tomato sauce
2 cups of beef broth
½ c heavy cream

Browning the Beef.

¼ cup fresh chopped cilantro

In 1-3 tbsp oil begin browning meat in small batches at med high heat.  You want to do it in small batches so it will develop a sear/crust on each side.  If the meat is touching, it will steam instead.  We want the yummy crust and the pretty color, not mushy, grey meat. 

After you brown both sides, remove from pan and drain on paper towels.  When the meat is cooked,  add the veggies, to the pan.  Cook them until they’re softened.  Add back the meat, (drained)garbanzo beans, tomato sauce and broth.  As you stir the liquids into the pan, make sure you’re scraping the bottom to bring up the bits into the sauce.  

Before adding the liquid.

Turn the heat down so that it cooks at a low simmer for 30-40 minutes.   Stirring every so often to make sure the bottom isn’t burning.  Add more broth if it gets too thick. 

When time has passed, take a taste to see if a little more salt is necessary.  Stir in the ½ cup cream and let simmer for another 5 minutes.  When ready to serve, sprinkle on fresh chopped cilantro. 

After adding the liquid.

Spoon it over rice.  I didn’t have any naan, so I just heated up flour toritllas brushed with a little butter.  It’s an easy substitution (says the American).

If all my children loved sweet green peas…I would’ve used those in place of the garbanzo beans.  You could probably just use veggies and omit the meat altogether and use veggie stock instead.  (gasp, don’t tell my carnivorous clan)

Transitions.....

I am a girl in transition; still a wife and mother, yes, but still in transition.  Three of my four children have gone out the door to school, and yes they are back by 3pm, yet I am in transition.  Extra time not spent peace keeping nine children can lend its self to many pursuits.  Unfortunately, watching Care Bears with Natalie has netted the lions share as I’ve been struggling with what’s next for me. 

Sweet Natalie has enjoyed the nail painting, I’ve enjoyed that too.  One on one time is certainly hard to come by.  A little friend to bake with, color with and play softball with is a rare gift indeed.  But, and here’s the honest but, it is mind numbingly boring.  There, I spit it out.  Don’t hate me or think I don’t appreciate my life.  It’s hard to be home alone with a three year old.  I know that this season will pass as all do.  I just needed to get that out. 

When I was five, I wanted nothing more than to be a mommy.  In High School it was that I wanted to be a writer.  What now?

If moving 752 miles away from family has taught me anything, it’s that change is inevitable.  Rather than fighting it or fearing it, why not embrace it?  I want to show my kids how not to be afraid. 

That’s what my pumpkin roll baking is….a lesson to them and I not to hide talents, but to use them.  Did it stink to not sell a lot at the two craft shows I went to?  Yes, it was embarrassing; but, I learned from it.  I choose to not stop putting myself out there because I might have a rough time of it.  In regards to cooking contests, I will still compete even if I don’t always win.  I am not a quitter and I don’t want my kids to learn that from me. 

What I do want for my children (as if I get a say) is for them to 1. Love the Lord.  He has been my rock and strong tower when all that was familiar was left behind.  2. I want them to follow their dreams, no matter how big.  3. I want them to never give up.  I know that the best way to teach that to them is to walk it out with courage and boldness every day that God gives me. 

Everyone should update their resume from time to time.

I’ve decided to update my resume with the headings of conflict resolution specialist, multi-lingual as well as a life coach.  You may be wondering what it is that I do.  Am I surviving in the jungle looking to bring rival tribes together at the watering hole?   No.  I am not.  There are times that I feel like I am wandering in the desert, but, alas I am at home.  Home with eight, sometimes nine children ranging in age from 2-12.  Don’t worry, they are not all mine, only half are. 

There seems to be an impossible divide to cross each day bringing these warring factions together.  The 6 year old finds it impossible to ignore the 3 year olds demands to “be the same character on tv.”  The 8 year olds can’t seem to find common ground at all other than a shared love for Ninjago.  Five year olds but heads like billy goats, and the 12 year olds circle each other warily due to the fact that they are of the opposite sex.  Sounds crazy, right? This rag tag bunch of chaos has taught me to diligently search out Peace at every opportunity. 

I try to teach them concepts of “bearing with each other in love”.  That means that even though that song you want to sing is cool to you, not everyone loves Justin Bieber so please don’t sing that around Harry because he doesn’t like it.  Taking his feelings into consideration and modifying your behavior shows Christ’s love.  (Romans 14:19)

I am learning to speak six-year old girl.  That language is hard for me due to the fact that my area of expertise is mainly in the male side of things.  I have three boys : Will (12) Harry (8) and Lucas (5).  My daughter Natalie is 3 going on 13.  To those who may not know, six year old girls are very cuddly and extremely moody.  They must sing songs the loudest and will sit still for hours if it means you will curl their hair or paint their toes.  They are the most frustrating creatures you will ever love. 

This summer’s quest for Peace has gone by very fast.  I like to think that I am making a small difference in their lives.  I was rewarded today by a sweet five year old finishing my sentence: Life’s not fair, but…God is good.  My goal has been to reinforce what I’ve gleaned from the past fifteen years as a believer of Christ.  That together as a team we will lift up and support the weaker members, even if it means we won’t get our way.   That we will not take revenge when our Lego masterpieces are destroyed, but that we will forgive the offender.  And, at the end of the day in their whispered “I love you, Miss Anne” I find my Peace